“Nervous system regulation” has become a popular term in the health and wellness world, but it’s often misunderstood. Some people believe that having a healthy nervous system means being in a constant state of calm—a sort of perpetual zen. However, this idea is not only unrealistic but can also be harmful. The pressure to maintain a serene state 24/7 can lead to feelings of shame or frustration when we inevitably encounter the ups and downs of life.

It’s important to recognize that “nervous system regulation” shouldn’t turn into the next form of toxic positivity—the notion that we should always stay positive, no matter the circumstances. Life is full of challenges, and it’s natural to experience a range of emotions, from calm and contentment to stress and discomfort.

For instance, when I’m soaking in a warm bath or enjoying a meal with a close friend, I feel calm and regulated. But when I’m stuck in traffic while running late, arguing with a partner, or gearing up for a big presentation, my fight-or-flight response kicks in—and that’s completely normal.

The key isn’t to avoid these stress responses but to develop the ability to recover from them. Small, temporary dips into fight-or-flight mode are healthy, as long as we can bounce back to a state of regulation afterward. This ability to return to balance is what defines a resilient nervous system.

But what does a resilient nervous system look like in practice? Imagine you witness a minor traffic accident during your morning commute. You might feel a surge of anxiety or unease. If your nervous system is resilient, you’ll likely return to a calm state by the time you arrive at work. However, if your system is less flexible, you might remain on edge, stuck in fight-or-flight mode for the rest of the day. This can lead to irritability, overreacting to minor issues, and heightened stress.

Building nervous system resilience is about more than just managing stress; it’s about learning how to navigate life’s inevitable challenges and recover quickly. One effective way to support this resilience is by paying attention to the people, places, and activities that help you feel safe and at ease—these are your “glimmers.” By regularly incorporating these calming influences into your routine, you can help “retrain” your nervous system to become more adaptable and resilient.

In my private 1-2-1 sessions, I delve deeper into the art of nervous system healing, sharing a comprehensive guide to finding balance, resilience, and overall well-being. Together, we explore practical strategies to strengthen your nervous system, so you can navigate life’s stresses with greater ease and confidence.

Thanks for reading!

Much love Louise xx